Hard-boiled cop Jack Caine seeks to avenge his partner's death at the hands of yuppie drug dealers. Unfortunately, he's distracted by the little problem of an alien murderously collecting brain endorphins to sell as drugs in the interplanetary black market...

Really, it's not my place to review low-grade, standard action flicks. That's Nathan's job. However, since this week is Dolph Lundgren A-Go-Go, I had to make an exception. Despite the rather nifty premise, though, this really is just another c-list action flick, complete with "hilariously" mismatched partners, big explosions, car chases through busy urban areas which inexplicably cause no pedestrian deaths, and all that. But, fortunately, it's also a rather fun c-list action flick.

As the film kicks off Dolph's partner goes undercover at a club that shows the dying gasps of the "Miami Vice" craze in detail. Unfortunately, the yuppie drug dealers fail to buy into Cannon Fodder Partner's act, things go horribly wrong, and Dolph's partner is kacked. It's by this point that you notice Dolph's character goes by the name Caine, which, I think, demonstrates that at least somebody had their Generic Action Films For Dummies book.

The fun really starts when a seven-foot alien humanoid pops up, slaughters the dealers' lackeys by shooting them with killer CDs (yes, I'm perfectly serious), and seizing the stash, which he proceeds to use in future scenes to inject fatal amounts of heroine into people, later using a creepy but functional device to drain their brain of the precious endorphins. It's here, though, that I also start having problems. For one thing, the alien just isn't that unique or intimidating. True, the device he uses to drain the endorphins from his victims' brains is something of a creative visual, but it's the only original thing about him. Basically, once you boil him down, he's just a big guy with goofy eyes who can only say, "I Come In Peace," and, except for a snide "I win" to Dolph, that really is all there is in his verbal repertoire. This is probably because the actor playing the alien drug collector is bad enough to bring even Dolph down into the depths. For another, that whole "they killed my partner and they must pay" thing is almost immediately dropped once Dolph gets involved in the alien affair, and it's never really completely resolved, although it's implied they're finished off by the alien itself.

But since this is a standard action film made in the late 80s/90s, it must imitate Lethal Weapon (which, it should be noted, in turn imitated "Miami Vice") and so we have, that's right, two unlikely partners! Dolph, whose character is your run-of-the-mill "renegade" cop is teamed up with, you guessed it, an anal, by-the-books FBI agent. And although they loathe each other at first, as time goes on and they're given the oppurtunity to save each other's lives, they grow to trust each other and yadda yadda yadda. But, despite its predictability (or maybe because of), the antics onscreen are still somewhat entertaining. Dolph, despite his reputation, really doesn't do too badly here, while the actor playing his partner Brian Benben settles comfortably into a completely banal role and, by treating it for what it is, manages to make it bearable.

Still, no one really watches this kind of thing for plot and character interactions, so I'll skip ahead to what's really important. There's plenty of big explosions and decent fight scenes to keep the Dolph fan base engaged and, although it's nothing spectacular, it's still impressive for a low-budget action movie. There's also a great car chase scene toward the end with the protagonists plowing their vehicle through a shopping mall while pursued by cops and a pissed off alien.

I think, especially compared to Masters of the Universe and The Punisher, this is one of the better Dolph Lundgren vehicles. In spite of the premise, it's in many ways pretty standard, but it has enough interesting little twists-from yuppie drug lords to endorphin-hooked aliens-to make it worth a shot.

Choice Quotes

"I come in peace!"
"And you'll leave in peaces, asshole."
-Caine, just before delivering the finishing blow to the alien.

Scenes To See:

-The Miami Vice Club (hey, is that Don Johnson?)
-The shopping mall rally
-The goofy ending (if only they laughed out loud)